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Young couple unable to make love
Q: I got married in March 2006. I am 27 years
old. My husband and I enjoy cuddling and masturbating each other, but
penetration has been a problem. I do not have any trouble taking his finger in.
I can also insert my fingers, a maximum of two to try to stretch it a bit.
However, he cannot insert himself into me because i feel so tight on the outer
portion. It seems to push against skin and any persistent pressure seems to
cause pain that's not severe, but uncomfortable.
I do not think I have vaginismus, but i know i am becoming more and more nervous
about the pain. How do I stretch my outer vagina? Does this mean my hymen might
still not be stretched?
Thanks,
Ms. Tight
A: To fully answer your question I'd need to know a few more
things, such as if your lubrication is adequate, the size of your husband's
penis, and so forth. However, from your description it sounds as if you may have
vaginismus or an intact hymen, but I (or some other doctor) would need to
examine you to determine that. Or your vagina may simply be naturally tight.
I had a similar problem with my girlfriend in medical school. Her vagina was so
tight that penetration was impossible, even with prolonged foreplay—8
hours, in one case! We didn't have money to see a doctor or to buy anything
expensive, but I eventually solved the problem. I used the tapered barrel from a
4-color Bic® pen (cleaned &
lubricated, of course) whenever we'd get together to help her vagina expand and
acclimate to something entering it. After several such treatments I substituted
the barrel from a 10-color pen, and eventually (a few weeks later) a vibrator
with a larger diameter. Once we obtained sufficient dilation that way, I was
finally able to enter her. Before we tried the progressive dilation procedure,
we'd tried (unsuccessfully) for months to have intercourse.
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